Saturday, January 08, 2011

One time big time accident

I was part of a vehicular accident a day ago and I wouldn't be able to go back to my normal routine in a few days. My face feels numb tho a part of it is aching.

I don't really feel like writing down how I look like because it makes me sad just thinking about it. The thought that I need to undergo some things really scares me.

I'm not blaming me or anyone for the accident. I just think it's meant to happen.

I've discovered a lot of things after the accident and I became more grateful of the littlest of good things that are happening to me right now. I've never appreciated people that much but yes, it's a turning point I do appreciate a lot of them now.

I think I found my safest place after losing it 5 years ago. I discovered that someone can actually stop my tears from falling. It's a nice and warm feeling knowing that I found my safest place back. And even though I'm not in my best condition right now, I am thankful that God gave me a chance to live and see the goodness in people.

It might seem untimely to say this, but yes.. I think I may be in love and because of the difficult situation that we're in, I choose not to tell him. He'll know probably later on.

I don't really like the line "I have fallen in love with you" because it makes things seem accidental. Well, love for me has always been a choice. For the past months, I've been trying to get that lovey dovey thought out of my head although my actions clearly show it. But now, yes.. I'm going to finally admit it to myself- I choose to Love once again. I don't know where this will take me but I want to take it slowly. I would like to enjoy the friendship that we have. Pure acceptance, respect and friendship. Yeah.. friendship. I'd like to start from there.

That night was just full of revelation. I learned a lot things from him which were supposed to make me feel surprised but yes... Surprisingly.. I just think it's normal and fun. At least I know he's not boring. hehehe..

Well, it's a different story if he does stuff like that at his current age (hoping that he lessened his adventurous side).

Right now.. I would say I'm scared but that thought that I can finally rely on someone (other than my family and my college friends) comforts me.

God, please don't send me any more challenges. Let it rest for a while. I'm trying to fight my fears right now. And.. yes, thank you for the biggest blessing you given me. Thank you.



Posted by Thinker :: 9:48 PM :: 0 Comments:

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