Reality Check!


Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Blank Mode

I want to live forever
Inside the nights and days.
Wishing on a silver cloud,
Crawling across the moonbeams.
A summer night in heaven
Between the stars and waves.
Race across the old bonfire;
Trample on my heartbeat.
I wanted to turn you on
My favorite song.
Wanted to be near you
But somebody owns you now.
I love you with a fire,
Ablazing till times end
But what good is a heart
When it shudders to speak.
I guess it's too late now.
"I wanted to turn you on
My favorite song.
Wanted to be near you
But (of course) somebody owns you now.
(And) I tried to live somehow
Somebody owns you now
Somebody owns you now

Posted by Thinker :: 10:58 PM :: 1 Comments:

Post a Comment

---------------------------------------

Tuesday, June 27, 2006

Lazy ass

Omg. I'm actually pushing myself to work tonight. The urge of studying is erm... non existent right now. Well... well... I've been like this since school started. I'm just not inspired to do whatever. I think I'm putting my future in jeopardy but hell. I should be motivated to do work today because
1. She opened the door... and smiled... I almost left my jaw hanging.
2. She was actually eavesdropping (Trust me... I can tell!) and watching our every move.
3. She stood beside me and was actually staring at me (ok.. Maybe I'm a feeler!) and so I greeted and she smiled back. And guess what? I almost fainted! hehe... I'm just exaggerating.
4. She stood beside me the whole time I was standing there. (arm to arm... elbow to elbow... whatever) and I just had to control myself from all the excitement.
Can't believe I have a crush. Although it's nothing serious, I still can't believe that I have a crush! I haven't been 'kilig' for quite some time.
Oh well. She's just some one with a gravitating presence. I got to get back to work.

Posted by Thinker :: 8:14 PM :: 0 Comments:

Post a Comment

---------------------------------------

Monday, June 26, 2006

Trust Issues

I had my share of lies. I was able to hurt a lot of people by lying. I lied my way out of high school by forging excuse letters so I can go home earlier than the rest of my classmates . I lie to my friends whenever I want to excuse myself from any gatherings... and of course.. I lied to my parents because they're too narrow minded.

I just had to stop lying. I lost the one and only person who made me feel safe. Yes, I lied to her and the guilt has been with me eversince. I could have told her the truth. Be open.Communicate. Be real. But I chose not to. ... My life... my appetite for a relationship... my happiness... my future... became bland.
If only I can turn back the hands of time. If only... But hell... I can't.
And now I'm a witness to lies. The intention may be good but it's not an excuse to use insensitive means to attain an intention. If they want to get something... If they want to reach their goal, then there are a lot of ways to attain it other than lying.
Isn't it frustrating that my parents lie... my sister lies a lot... my x lied to me... some of my friends are bad liars... everyone's a liar... making it hard for me to trust. Lying destroys trust. If everyone will lie, then who am I going to trust? How am I suppose to know if a person is sincere of she's just making a damn fool out of me?
I don't make any fucking sense. Tell me, IS TELLING THE TRUTH REALLY SUCH A HARD THING TO DO?

Posted by Thinker :: 7:55 PM :: 0 Comments:

Post a Comment

---------------------------------------

Friday, June 23, 2006

this is the latest

"I Just Died"



Staring in the mirror as I
Start to carefully contemplate
Just really how deep is this thing I have for you
It's wearing on my heart
And from the start you know I tried, steadily denied
Friendship turn to love
I know you probably think that I'm so strange -
Stuttering on every word when you look my way, why?
And maybe it's all in my mind
But when we hugged goodbye I had butterflies
I just died (yeah yeah yeah)I just died in your arms tonight
Don't want nobody to bring me back to life(I just died in your arms tonight, hey)
I just died in your arms
I just died in your arms tonight, tonight
Your finger hushed my lips
As I tried to explain maybe why you and I should hide from such a love affair
My friends think that I'm so insane
To fight this feelingBut my life's at stake
Your embrace, thoughts won't erase
Every now a minute of the day I wait and hope and pray
That you might stay
And now you're moving oh so closely
Killing me so softly, so softlyI just died
I just died in your arms tonight
Don't want nobody to bring me back to life(I just died in your arms tonight, hey)
I just died in your arms
I just died in your arms tonight, tonight
I just died in your arms tonight
Don't want nobody to bring me back to life(I just died in your arms tonight, hey)
I just died in your arms
I just died in your arms tonight, tonight[Musical interlude]
I just died in your arms tonight
Don't want nobody to bring me back to life(I just died in your arms tonight, hey)
I just died in your arms
I just died in your arms tonight, tonight
I just died in your arms tonight
Don't want nobody to bring me back to life(I just died in your arms tonight, hey)
I just died in your arms
I just died in your arms tonight, tonight




*I've been dead for quite sometime. Can you bring me back to life? We'll see.

Posted by Thinker :: 11:54 AM :: 0 Comments:

Post a Comment

---------------------------------------

Wednesday, June 14, 2006

Busy start

I'm here at the cybernook. goshness...I'm already doing my homeworks this early (10:45 am).

Posted by Thinker :: 10:45 AM :: 0 Comments:

Post a Comment

---------------------------------------

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

YM unavailable

TO: Oinky

Hey! How was your workout? did you lose weight na? hahhaha! Just messing with you!
Can't chat sa YM. Bulok. Do you have the messenger ng Google? Ako, I don't have. haha!
I used to have one. My cousin and I chat there sometimes. I tried it only twice. YM is still the best. :) Eist! I thought add mo nako sa friendster? tsk tsk... tagal naman... super close na nga tayo di ba concerned citizen? O feeling close lang ako kse feeling ka? hahaha! My gulay. I'm being malabo na to the highest level. I'm so tired. I just finished doing the scrapbook. Grabehan no? sabi ko 6pm finish na.. 12:35 saka lang natapos. Oh well.



Do you know why I placed my message here sa Blog? e kse, d nagwowork yung email ko. Gawd! Grabehan! Malapit na isugod sa ICU un pc ko.



Anyway, that'll be it. Be happy always! I'll always be your gayish drinking buddy (erm.. RedHorse is an exception please) . Regards to Flo (ngak! feeling close! haha!)! :D

Posted by Thinker :: 12:37 AM :: 0 Comments:

Post a Comment

---------------------------------------

Monday, June 12, 2006

I'm not sad. I'm just crazy.

If you only knw how much my world sucks...I'm trying to be a better person while my whole world is falling apart. I'm seeking for that safest place... the only place that will shield me from all the pain - the arms that can make me numb and smile through all the heartaches. Do I sound like I'm desperate? Well, I was. Now... I have just gotten insane.


Will I let anyone save me?

Posted by Thinker :: 5:35 PM :: 0 Comments:

Post a Comment

---------------------------------------

Friday, June 09, 2006

Baliw

Sa pagpikit ng mga mata,
may isang mundong di sinasadyang makita.
Lahat ay posible...
Lahat ay malaya...
Kada isang isip ay may nalilikha.
Ito ay aking sinimulan
dahil sa mga bagay na gustong takasan...
...ang sakit
...ang kalungkutan
...ang poot
...na dulot ng mga taong sarado ang pagiisip
at pilit na nagmamaang-maangan.
Ang mundong itinago,
nagdala ng sikretong galak.
Isang damdaming walang makatanggap.
Isang kasinungalingan na patuloy na niyayakap...
...wag lamang maramdaman ang habag ng iba.
Ngunit sino ang may sala?
Ang tadhanang patuloy sa kalupitan?
Ang isip kong napuno na lamang ng ikinubling pangarap?
Ang damdamin kong dinapuan ng kalungkutan?
O ang realidad na hindi ko na talaga maintindihan?

Posted by Thinker :: 11:51 PM :: 0 Comments:

Post a Comment

---------------------------------------