Reality Check!


Sunday, January 21, 2007

To the Sober Cleo

Cleo,
You owe yourself a lot of things tonight. You lost something that is really important to you. Why? You didn’t stand up for it. You’re a coward. You use your heart too much and yes, that’s a quality that most people simply don’t have. But think. Right now, your heart’s not only hurting but also your brain. You know what you’ve always wanted. Why ignore it? Why think of other people? At the end of the day, when everyone’s concentrated with their lives… you are still left to carry that burden. Do what pleases you but make sure you can handle all the consequences that go with it.
After tonight, you’re going to look back and regret it. Regret, Cleo. REGRET – the word that you most dislike. You let someone down tonight (people even). You know it. You don’t have to care if the world will find a certain act ridiculous. That’s what you feel like doing. It’s not as if they’re going to die from it?! They won’t be with you every time you’re feeling lonesome or whatever. You got to make yourself happy. Make yourself happy, Cleo. And yes.. even if it means you have to be selfish at times. Bakit? Sila ba hindi ba sila selfish? E ubod nga silang lahat ng selfish e kaya sila happy. Lahat naman may tendency to become selfish so why act like a saint palage?! Don’t care if a situation or whatever (or whoever) is not worth your tears. These tears make you a lot better than all of them. They can’t do what you’re doing because they’re focused on what will make them happy. They can defend yun sarili nila. Obvious ba?! It’s time to defend yourself too. Defend. Three words Cleo, Fuck - them - all.


Screaming out loud,
Cleo-under the influence of alcohol

Posted by Thinker :: 1:20 PM :: 0 Comments:

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Thursday, January 18, 2007

World, shut up.

Who wants to be that crazy girl who needs to know exactly what is going on the minute she meets a guy? You want to be the cool girl – the girl who knows how to hang out and not be all demanding. That’s who I always wanted to be. That’s who I always was.
The thing about that cool girl is that she still gets her feelings hurt. She still has reactions to how she’s being treated. She still hopes he’ll call, wonders when she’ll get to see him again, and if he’s excited about being with her. -"He's just not that into you"

Posted by Thinker :: 5:33 PM :: 0 Comments:

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Monday, January 08, 2007

I know strangers wouldn't understand. The hell with them. This is what I feel.

Anonymous said...
know what?! love someone that u dont have 2b fancy or talk in a special way.. or u have 2mind ur manners or wear ur best clothes 2pretend u're happy when u're feeling sad. just love someone u can cry with, u can laugh out loud with..where u can can speak ur mind or say nothing at all.. actually u don't have 2 try hard just 2impress him/her with everything.. just go with someone that u can just be YOU.. and appreciate u for that..^bLuR^

-to Blur: You're right. However, I am not trying to impress anyone. I tend to be a little conscious but I have always been true to the people around me and most especially to myself. I can't choose who I have to love. If I do that, I'll be fooling my heart. I reflect how I feel. I rationalize and make excuses. I try to avoid the feeling but if that feeling simply sits there, then I embrace it. I then decide on loving the person. THAT'S THE TIME WHEN LOVE BECOMES A DECISION. Also, I know a lot of people who can make me laugh, who can cry with me, who can be good conversationalists, but their wits failed to change my view on Commitment. This person - the one that I'm talking about - is a plain jane who gradually changed my outlooks without her knowing it. That's what made her stand out. That's what made her visible. It's too bad that things didn't work out the way everyone expected it to happen but I'm glad to know that someone like her can make my heart beat faster and slower at the same time.

Posted by Thinker :: 7:25 PM :: 2 Comments:

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Of Faith and Fate

This is the first time that I’ve really put my devotion on something that does not have any system of reasoning. I think this is what they call GREAT Faith. Maybe this goes beyond logic. It’s just a strong feeling – an intense one.
This is new to me – putting my faith in fate. And now I feel so helpless. I am not the type who’ll live and wait around while hoping that fate would make my prayers tangible. I know I have to be in control but this time, I choose to give in and believe that one IMPORTANT part of my life will be relied on fate.

As I’ve always said, Love is not just mere feeling but is also a decision. Love is putting your faith on someone while facing the fear that she might not come back and return that faith to you.

It feels like I’m slowly withering away…

Posted by Thinker :: 12:10 AM :: 1 Comments:

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