Reality Check!
Monday, October 30, 2006 chimera's the one. Q:What can be achieved just based on a single person? How far can you go? CHIMERA: I want to try. When I die, I will look back and see how much have I failed, and how much have I achieved? Doesn' matter which one is more. I just want to feel that I have been doing my best to lead my life well. As long as it's something I can do, I want to do, I want to challenge it. I want to challenge the impossible. 
Wednesday, October 25, 2006
Monday, October 23, 2006 while hating me and wanting to let go. I knelt. I cried. I beggged. I almost died. I hang on... ...She let go. releasing my hand... but grasping my heart into eternity. It overflowed with warmth... burned with love... and melted in pain. A heart only meant only for her. She died. We died. But i continuously dig her grave. Searching for her ashes... these useless dusts I wish to embrace. Only then did i realize... the I can never resurrect the dead. Thanks trishy squishy for inspiring me to write. hehe..
Saturday, October 21, 2006 A little something to share. I admire whoever made the lyrics of this song. I Miss You (Incubus) To see you when I wake up Is a gift I didn’t think could be real. To know that you feel the same as I do Is a three-fold, utopian dream. You do something to me that I can’t explain. So would I be out of line if I said, I miss you.(? ) I see your picture, I smell your skin on the empty pillow next to mine. You have only been gone ten days, but already I’m wasting away. I know I’ll see you again Whether far or soon. But I need you to know that I care And I miss you.
Friday, October 20, 2006 caeyo: I wonder if you have always hated me. I just think that I deserve a clear explanation about everything. I don't know why but I feel like I'm left hanging. I don't think I got the closure that I needed from you. Maybe I was left in disbelief. I was probably disillusioned... maybe I still am. What hurts until now is we didn't get to save our friendship. It really was a bad break up since I've gotten so dependent on you. I think I still am. I can't believe some things never change. I don't know if you'll get this. I'm probably blocked off from your list and you probably think that this message is trash. It's fine with me, it'll always be ok. Just be happy because right at this moment, I'm loving you in the best way that I can.
Thursday, October 19, 2006 --- THANKS. YOUR COMMENT WOULD HAVE MADE A STRONGER IMPACT IF ONLY YOU KNOW HOW TO USE A "." (PERIOD).
Monday, October 09, 2006 and my hands are getting sweaty because of nonstop typing... and my head is clouded by Mr. Raymond Cattell's Sixteen Personality Traits... it drilled Some ... - Exist ONLY through happy times. - Exist ONLY through my miseries. - Exist ONLY when they have good news. - Exist ONLY when they have gossips. - Exist ONLY to make pacute and blab about how blue the sky is. and it drilled some more... until a hole in my idealistic perception appeared. Lesson: Never expect people to be there when you are experiencing hell SIMPLY because they told you that they'll be there when in fact THEY FAILED TO SHOW UP. Nakakahiya. I did something pa naman because I was damn proud of their existence. What happened today was like a slap on my face.
Monday, October 02, 2006 My hands were getting clammy as the page started to open. I was hating. If punching the monitor would actually hurt her... damn... I would really CRUSH IT TO PIECES. WHAT IS LACKING IN ME? WHAT'S SO SPECIAL ABOUT HER? IS IT BECAUSE I'M NOT WHITE ENOUGH? IS IT BECAUSE SHE'S WORKING ALREADY? You see, it's still a mystery. I don't know if I'm the one to blamed with what happened. I don't know if they were just waiting for me to commit a mistake so that they can be together. Maybe Kuting's not really the best - the ideal person. Maybe I served as a patch while she was waiting for her ideal person. Maybe I conditioned myself too much. Everything's a MAYBE but I'm UNQUESTIONABLY hurting. How can a relationship of almost 2 years hurt me like this? Was it just a game? Am I the only fool who took the game seriously? I lost her. We lost the relationship... we lost the friendship. It feels as if I'm not allowed to be her friend. Is it because of MS. JOANE? Or is it her own selfish choice?
|
::Reality Check!::
::Author::
::Recent Entries::
::Archives::
::Daily Reads::
::Caeyo Agrees::
::Beautiful People::
::Credits::
|
