What happened to my Lolo is just... heartrending. Apparatuses were attached to him and he was shaking. I held his hand. It was actually the first time I did that and I was secretly wishing that I could've held his hands and throw some corny jokes when he can still laugh with me.

I was on my way to visit him when it suddenly hit me... Everything can happen in just a snap. A split second can alter one's lifetime and no matter what we do and how we do it we can never bring back that same split second.

I worry about a lot of things most of time. I have been crying buckets of tears for someone who doesn't even know that I'm still crying. I have been studying my head off just to make a "come back" in the DL. I have been trying to really dress up so to feel pretty every ugly day. I have been absent from the real essence of LIFE. I forgot what life is all about. Is it about Love? Is it about success? Is it about money? Is it about Religion?

I am completely lost and I have wasted gazillions of my time ... probably for nothing really worth living.